Angie | ♥ yourapplepie : reflections

Sunday, January 20, 2019

Farewell, 2018

Happy 2019 !

While 2018 was filled with nasty lessons one after another, it is time to review the chapter and move on for the next. A few days ago, I sat down with my BFF, Adel, to do a quick recap for 2018 and vision-planning for 2019. Each year both of us will take a day to talk about the previous year and visualise what we intend to do for the new year and we have been doing this activity for a couple of years now. Because both of us are trained to facilitate conversations, we were able to conduct it to push for better and clearer insights, and set it on an action plan. We then complete it with a vision board, where I did mine using Pinterest.com.

Here’s the questions we asked ourselves this year.

What did I learnt In 2018 ?

2018 has been a difficult year for everyone, I’m no exception. I had almost half the year of downtime as I tried out new business ideas as I expand and shifted my role as an agent. And I was broke AF oh gosh. Took more exams to up my game in the finance industry and saw/hear negative things of me from people I looked up to.

In 2018, I learned that it is okay to put yourself and your interests first, walk out from toxic environments and that only you will love yourself the most. I started to spend more time with myself and catching and watching the balance of my mental and physical health. I no longer is in guilt for what I do, neither do I owe anyone a living.

In 2018, like I said earlier, I made use of the downtime from my transition by taking up courses, read more and gain more. When this is published, I should have gotten my certificate for being a Certified Facilitator for The Leadership Challenge. ( Been procrastinating on the assignment! Argh ) Also, I cleared all my General Insurance papers which I’ve always wanted to do since I joined the industry. Not just that, I up-ed my game in numberology. (Wakao it is so difficult la)

p/s : Typing this made me so happy already.

I gained to know more about myself, my struggles and ways to make myself better. I’m so thankful. :)

What is difficult to do in the start of 2018, but is manageable now .

Getting off work to self- love

THIS is the toughest of in the list. I was pretty much always living in the shadow of someone else’s ( eg my boss my friends etc ) and constantly felt guilty when I take time off to do things I want to. Often, I get negative comments and they suck. After my career shift in the middle of the year, I decided to just f*ck it. I need to stop living for others and my past.

Attracting financial abundance

An extension from the previous point, I was also constantly feeling that if I don’t work, I would be poor and then no time/ resources to take care of the rest. I was having hard time with my finances especially when you have about half an year of having barely no income/ surviving on very little money. It created a lot of anxiety problems for me. Thankfully, I’ve shifted my mindset. It is okay to get off work/ earn less to do things that can make me happier and when I am happier, the rest of the things would flow. Money will also come naturally.

Change for being more present.

I came to a point in my life that I realised that I was either living in my past or I was in my future. I was a dreamer. Probably the reason why I couldn’t link my thoughts and actions together to turn it into the reality. I wasn't really paying attention to people in my life cause I was not present at all. I'm still learning so give me some time. For now, I take baby steps to access my present situations and think through of what are the actual useful steps for me to make.

Take care of yourself and the universe will take care of the rest.

Yup. As real as it is.

Acknowledging problems, be aware and resolve it.

Being part of positive living is to acknowledge the existence of problems, feelings & emotions and circumstances. It is only when we acknowledge them, we can let go and move on. That would also help to gain more awareness, and resolve issues easier. Thus, improving in our problem solving skills and adaptability.

What do you want to achieve in 2019 ?

Be more present and be grounded
Feel the fear and do it anyway.
Better discipline
Spend time and attention wisely
Plan for my retirement.
Travel more; see more; experience more;
Converting my business ideas into reality
Read more
Sponsor a child.

Can't wait to experience what 2019 has for me .
Loves,
A.

25 things I've learnt at 25

Mahjong
Oh gosh, this has took me long enough. I mean like "I'm Chinese! I should I know this at the back of my mind! "
I'm still bad at it but hey! at least I've got some basics there.
Be truthful towards your feelings

I've been drowning myself with positive thoughts, positive vibes all these years while I keep myself out of my shit hole to realise that, hey! that's not how it works. And I realised that that's what people have been doing too.

"Wrap yourself with positive people, positive vibes, positive every single thing"
So much positivity that it can do harm than good. I've learnt to address my feelings like a little kid, by asking myself questions on what have I done right to have a great day and vice versa. Of course, on bad days, learning to grill myself with questions like : What's wrong, what caused me to feel in a certain negative way and then resolve it. ( Here you go, a good practice on Design Thinking! ) Basically finding the root of the problem and then a solution to make it better. :)
Categorise your friends - "Yes" / Sour / The Guide

The "Yes" friend is anyone's favourite, they agree to everything you say and of course say what you want to hear. Everyone likes things that is pleasant to them.
The sour friend on the other hand is someone who have gotten something nasty to comment about ANYTHING. A bad listener and a worst one to heed advise from.
The guide is one like a life coach ; that friend that makes sure you are on track and make sure you are set for your goals.

None of them are bad friends, they are good in their own way but knowing which category they belong to had made me a better person/friend/team player. It helped me respond better in situations and know who to look for when I need affirmation (to the YES friend!). Sour friends are good for gossips plus they are great people who have tons of great deals. It also makes ME reflect on what kind of friend am I too as well as to who I should hang out with .
Create more than you consume

I had to credit it to the original writer though I can't remember who. The thing is this, I've been "consuming" lot of content online, by consuming I meant reading articles, watching videos etc. I have been doing so much of that, I forgot to "return" the favour by contributing to the community with the knowledge I have! That's bad, and so I decided to share as much as I can, maximise my creativity and inspirations for and with the common good. Busy is just an excuse.
Skincare first, Make-up second
Aging is real, that's what I always say and that's freaking truth. With that, it means that I age and I have to spend more money on getting my skin right. Also, learning to be comfortable with my own skin. Uncomfortable, painful and disgusting process I'm putting myself through.

I try to not wear any make up as long as I'm not meeting important clients, or events to attend while taking pictures without makeup is still a huge NO. I'll learn, I promise.
Do what you need to do.
If it's right or has to be done, do it, somehow.
Change
Change is this scary shit friend that freaks us all out. But the only constant is, CHANGE.. Whether you change for the best or for the worst. So feel the fear, but do it anyway.
Be adventurous
Do things that you have never done before, go places you've thought of before.
Life's not a buffet.
Can't have too much on your plate, woman. It causes ingestion and there's a drop in food quality. Some days we fall for greed, we just have to remember to climb out from that.
Be Hungry
Always remember for the days you do not have enough food, to remind yourself to appreciate what you have and be a better self.
Everyone have something to teach you.
And if you are not open about it, you are losing out.
My takeaway from this : NEVER JUDGE, Be kind, put on a smile and strike a conversation. You'll never know the impact that person can bring to you.
Fix things, mend things and not discard them
Be it an item, or a relationship - learn from the problem first.
Be curious
Have an open mind,always
Never Mind
But never mind. Never mind about what people say and their opinions, never mind about mistakes.
Never mind about the judgement.
Keep learning.
Learn from everything that comes your way - Feelings, mistakes, any life lessons
Numerology
I guess the most interesting subject that I've got in touch would be to learn about numerology. Yup, upgrading my witchcraft one step at a time.
Do the right thing
The world is small, the world is connected.
Don't do shit cause people will find out.
It's ok to be alone
I am totally fine with being alone, and people needs to know that.
People needs to know that we don't need other human to be with us to survive. We came to the world alone and we will leave alone too.
Love yourself first
<3
Fundamentals of The Leadership Challenge
and putting the five practices into daily use. It is not something new in my life, but knowing it in-depth and finally practicing it daily is. There are still so much to become a better leader to my peers and especially towards myself.
The Science of Meditating
At 25, I finally took the time off for meditation and it was one of the best decision made. It decluttered my mind, helped me be more mindful and showed more gratitude to the earth and universe.
Be Sincere
Always. Be. Nice. Sincerity will lead you to great things.
Kindness always triumphs
Be Kind, even if the world fails you.
Take Care of yourself.
And the universe will take care of the rest. It is only when we take care of ourselves, respect our body, communicates with our minds, the best will find its way to us.
You make your own happiness.
You are the one that would put a smile on your face and you are in full control of that, and your life.

Happy Birthday, me.

With a lot of love,

Me VS Decluttering

Recently I have been very into like decluttering (???) and I was like "oh shit is this the start of my auntie life" hahaha. And I'm hooked. Well it has nothing to do with my auntieness thou, I found myself reading articles and more articles , videos after videos about how clutter or rather mess at home have an impact on one's mental Heath and how it does affects the mood and productivity, and I found joy doing it.

OMG Angie , what have you become to.

" tidy home is a tidy mind"

Then, I chanced upon this lady by the name of Marie Kondo, where she introduced the Konmari Method - an organization style to simplify and organise. She is also the author of " "The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up." It's crazy I tell you.

Here’s some of the things that I've learned throughout this process

Get rid of duplicates
We often buy things that are similar or even repeated without us realising and that is mainly just out of habit ; we like we buy.
Get rid of things you have not use in a year.
During my first attempt to declutter, I didn't want to let go of anything. Like why would I want to! I spent money on them and I want them in my life. However, I realised that there were more than 50% of the items that I've never touched them for years.They were just sitting in the wardrobe/drawers/basically some corner in the house and doing nothing, totally serving no purpose at all!

Meanwhile, I'm determined to build a classic wardrobe with quality pieces that I hope to last me for years (of course still have some fashion pieces to spice up the look.)
Don't keep things out of guilt
I still keep items that are sentimental for me ; like all handwritten cards and gifts from friends/students etc. There were other items that it's just there and you would want to throw.
A home for everyone
There should be a place for everything, which then leads to being organised. Efficient tip! In her books/videos, she shared that every item should have a place to where they belong and thus not having a mess afterwards. Personally, I still struggle to keep the different things in place and even when I do, I realised that the lazy bad habit would make it tough - "Aiya just left it on the table first, later then put it back" This shit never happens wtf.
Plunge, then decide the next home for that itemThis is an important factor in the Konmari Method, Marie Kondo shared in her books and videos to set up 3 stacks - Keep , Give/sell, Throw. To begin decluttering, one can have three baskets, and then decide where each item belongs. Items belonging to the give/sell or throw section can be to sold via various platforms, donated/ give away or worst condition throw away or do some sorta recycling. It can be a painful process at the start, but would be something so fruitful and would also feel lighten up afterwards.

It's been an amazing journey to declutter and hopefully better in the future!
Loves,

Things to Plunge

Since I've been doing so much decluttering in my life right now, it was also an indication of how my money should be spent wisely. And because I'm so into it right now, I had to influence my friends to do the same. I realised that these are some of the common things my friends and I had to get rid of and you really have to remove the guilt in order to do so. People come and go, so do your items.

TL;DR : What Comes after decluttering :)

Make up

I think most girls would have this problem - buying too much make up. I personally don't really spend much on make up itself but sometimes you would really need variety and that's when horror comes in. I threw away one whole box of expired make up in such some has not even been opened yet.

Clothes

Oh dear, it's like never ending wtf. There are always clothes that has to go. With taobao and fast moving fashion, I could easily say that most girls would have clothes that they never wear it more than 5 times. I know like it's bit painful for the wallet but you know what, Carousell and refash is here to save the day.

At the same time, it is also good time to perhaps start a habit to invest in clothing that are more versatile.

Books

Come on, who still read books nowadays.

Opt for e-book or audio books instead, it's not only better for the environment, it is also more convenient to bring around. You can either sell them or just donate it to the community library near you. I've donating mine to my students, cousins and lastly to the community library.

Nail polish

I'm not sure about about others, but there was a period that I was all about nails and I had tons of nail polishes all in different shades of Colours. They all had to go. Who has time to wait for them to dry anymore?

Anyway they are bad for the nail bed too.

Electronics

When I as going through my own apartment, I took out so many things , like the old Nokia phones(that you can't even charge) and the webcams and the never ending spoilt cables and earpieces. Keep for what, really.

I also later found out that these electronic waste should be dispose properly.

Costume Jewellery

There are like clothes, elements that enhances the outfit wtf. Even if you don't have make up, you would still have costume Jewellery, price ranges from $1 to maybe hundred over dollars for better quality or designer items. I'm so guilty of this cause I had so much and I don't wear them anymore. I try to sell those designer items on Carousell while the Taobao/77th street ones, I just throw.

Decorations

For the house, for the room - they are all just collecting dust now. So, Throw!

Knicks Knacks

Same for this. it's crazy to look at them, think back about the dollars spent on it. Bad habit that gotta go! No more shopping and impulse purchases on knick knacks!

Magazines

I've ton of magazines, from idol magazines and J-pop ones, where I picked up my Japanese makeup and fashion skills, they all have to go now. Let's be honest, no one opens them up to read anymore. *roll eyes*

Gift bags

Awwww, those pretty paper bags that could have cost $2 for one. They are really pretty, unless you found a way to give them a second life, then get them out of the house. It's painful to get rid of them I know! T.T

Expired medication

I researched and articles said that they are still good for use even after 15 years, but isn't it weird and not worth the risk for taking expired medication? And also, how often we do go back to old medication when we are not well. Certainly they have to go, just for safety.

Receipts

The thing about receipts is we just keep them for no apparent reason. We pay and then we chuck it into our bags or wallets and they will be there for as long as we don't remember them. For myself, I keep them for filing taxes, but otherwise, they have to go too.

p/s: Ways to get rid of plunge items.

So grateful that life have been easier with all these platforms! It's like garang guni man but modernized.

Carousell
Game-changer ; I've sold countless things on the app, so did my friends. From camera to phones to my luxury bags, just blessed that I barely have any carouhell moments and glad that I managed to make friends with my buyers!

At the same time, I manage to get some steals too! Need something? Carousell it first.
Flea market
Interesting experience ; It's expensive, dusty and troublesome but I feel that it's worth the experience. I did my first flea at Lucky Plaza where there are tons of people who really appreciate what you have to offer at a low price and gives the items a new life. Flea markets are a good place to get rid of clothes, accessories, shoes, or even suitcases. The demographics are lucky plaza are domestic helpers and our customers were buying for themselves or their family members in their hometown.

Thing to note : Be nice, fleas are not really for you to make money, be prepared to spend the whole day standing and shouting and handle people who haggle for lower prices. Remember that you are there to get rid of plunge, your aim is to not bring home anything but cash.
Facebook Marketplace
Relatively new and great place to sell anything! I could easily get 10 or more enquiries in a day when I posted about selling my iPhone 7 plus. The Facebook Marketplace is like flea market, but virtual.
Donate it away!
Not into selling or getting cash back ? Then donate it! There are many avenues for donations, Salvation Army, religion groups, thrift stores etc.
Just throw it away wtf.
If item is damaged and beyond hope for a second life, no explanation needed. Just into the bin .

It does take some guts to part with the items, but once it's done , I promise that you will feel a little lighter overall. :)

Loves,

Whirlwind

It's crazy, before I could update on the space about the start of my 2016, 2017 has ended and so is the first quarter of 2018. Here's a summary.

In 2016, I completed my unfinished business (overdue modules from school). Phew, no more crying and reading and studying at the same time. And also completed 4 basic sets of exams from SCI (Singapore College of Insurance). Became a financial services consultant at the end of that year, while I enjoyed the job scope as much as I did, I was still doing what I love - teaching and training.

I hope that answers everyone who's asking me about what do I really do. I train/coach, I give tuition (still, to my existing students) and I also I advise on financial planning.

And I still do, I have a clear vision for what I envision. The difference now? I left the company that I joined in Nov 2016.

There's so many things to say; it was not a decision I made over a fortnight, not influenced by any and most importantly - it came from the heart. While part of me still have mixed feelings for the change, I'm grateful and I'm excited for better things to come.

Loves,
A.

Struggles of 2017

The greatest struggle of all is - to keep this online diary alive. Most of the people that I know personally and majority of the public views everyone with a blog as a blogger and they are a scam and always get freebies. Unfortunately I dont, I do occasionally get invites from my influencer friends for parties/food tasting/product launch etc but personally, I have NEVER email any company to get something in return.My blog still truly stand as a publicly viewed online journal of my personal snippets and highlights in life that I want to remember, mostly happy stuff. thankfully.

In 2017, I was so busy that I don't even know what I was busy with, I drafted more more than 40 posts, but they never made it to the light. I'm also guilty for towards my PR friends who have been patiently waiting for my review about products and food and whatever lah, and I took forever. I also wasn't able to keep up with my monthly highlight series - which I curated to make my life easier by summarizing everything for the month into one post. I kinda stopped after the death of my iphone 6s but I promise they will be out soon! They are all in my drafts wtf.

The next struggle has to be my work life. As most would know, I'm contracted as a Financial Services Consultant with one of the Top3 insurers in Singapore, as much as I enjoyed the job, there were more downs than ups, with I am still coping as a soft skills trainer and still teaching my private tuition classes.

Life's been pretty rocky and I'm trying.

Thank you my little angels (the you reading this) for staying by and keeping up with me.

With tons of love this time,
A.

What's my WHY

Here I am, looking as though I'm pretty good at what I'm doing, enjoying what I do but yet I'm struggling to find the WHY in my life.

At age 24, I still wonder why did I wake up for, why do I take up certain roles, why this and why that but never the WHY that makes me want to wake up the next morning ans say " Here's my best day in my life yet, I am performing the best that I can and I will become better after today."

Instead, I spent late nights like this asking myself WHY to my insecurities towards my looks, my life, my career and mainly how people look at me and the list never stops.

I clearly knew what's right from what's wrong. I know the actions to be done yet the monster is still being able to take over.

Dear Universe, will you tell the WHY to live?

Loves,
A.

ONLY THREE

The BFFL and I had been really busy for the past few months in whatever we were doing and we hardly had time for each other so much so that I missed her so much. While I spent most of my morning and late night procrastinating, I was also trying out "The rule of Only Three" to manage my time and lifestyle a little better. I've been trying out for a while and was sharing it with the BFF so I thought why not do up an entry about it and who knows, I might benefit someone else.

p/s : I came out with the tittle of "The Rule of Only Three" but it is just part of my nonsensical Angie Theory. I'm sure there's a more prof way or has been credited for something similar like that. If there's an official term for it, do let me know!

The idea of it was first shared with me by Mint where she mentioned that we should not overwork ourselves by doing more than 3 things at a time. At that period of time, I had several "jobs" up my sleeve! I was getting my income from my Full-time then part time Client Service Associate position in a MNC, a virtual personal assistant, teaching private tuition and at the same time, a full time student at SIM. That would mean that I had to juggle between work and school. Most of the days I slept at 3-4am whereby I would spent my breaks in between lectures to email/speak/liase with clients, do up my admin stuff and then to teach tuition or be in the office, only after I'm done with what puts bread on my table, I would start on studying for test, working on my assignments. I was so exhausted I would take any bus ride my nap session. I quit my office job eventually but I was still very much overwhelmed with work. After she shared the idealogy with me, I kinda felt that it made sense and that I should also improve on how to balance and make use of my time more efficiently. So I started to drop and give up opportunities after my graduation and limit myself to only FOCUS on 3 things at a time which was teaching and being more proactive in outdoor activities.

It was quite tough to begin with, as I struggled with my own emotions about having lesser income, not able to sustain my previous lifestyle and things like that. Slowly, I got the hang of it and then I moved on to only do 3 things in a day. For example, I would only go to three different locations in a day and nothing more that. On a teaching day, that would mean that I can only teach 3 students at 3 locations in a day before I tire myself out mentally. Another example of a typical day would be, T1: Practice my electone ; T2 : Prepare notes and worksheets for my students ; T3 Dinner plans.

I do feel that it helped to balance that delicate level for my time management, while I need to learn to manage my own feelings and emotions, it decreased my anxiety and put me into more effort in each. New and good habits are going to take some time to stay so hopefully I can maintain it!

Loves,
A.

Hey 23rd

Hey me , Happy 23rd.
Look at you it has been 23 years on earth, how's your stay at this planet so far?

Here's me, at 3.49am on my birthday typing on how I am sinking in as a twenty-three year old.
Dear future me, what do you think? Did you cringe reading this?

HAPPY TEACHERS' DAY to me.
Thank you for teaching yourself life lessons like moving away from toxic people, appreciated your loved ones, baby steps outta your comfort zone, influencing youths, enjoying what you do for a living and most importantly be happy. I can't wait to be better things in life, be a better me, and just keep going. May I be able to continue whatever I enjoy and what I feel right, for as long as I want to.

Happy New Year Babe!
We still have 3 more months to finish off the year, but I am proud of me so far for this is one of my best achievement year. I really think I did quite a lot, and some that I never thought I would.
Good job me, I did SNSC Level 1, got my Class 3 License, finished my education with a Bachelors', just to name some. I'm sure I'm up for some new ventures and a brighter future. Isit now that I can start to live for myself? I am not sure, I hope so and please be.

Year 23, what am I expecting in the next 365 days?

Loves,
A.

A little more, 2016

p/s: this is like a personal reflection so.. it is probably gonna bore you.

In the year of 2016, I started the year without any fireworks viewing, no fancy outfit, no party make up, no squeezing in the countdown parties crowd, no alcohol,no pictures, no everything but spending the last hour of 2015 with the people who matter most. It was cozy, quiet, but close to heart. And we did online shopping and bought a $100 + bag. #HUATZ

Looking back, 2015 had been a year of reflections and soul searching.
Despite not having much achievement, I (surprisingly) surpass my happy quota, and may I continue to exceed it in the upcoming year.

Oopsies that I took so long to publish this as I was barely breathing from the things I were doing. I enjoyed them but it's pulling me away from this little space so I was glad that I found some time on a Sunday morning, finishing up this post that should have been published on the first week of January. Anyway still before Chinese New Year la hor, still in time ok.

Instead of doing a typical New Year blog post that I would ~~not~~ fulfill, I thought of just sharing how I can achieve things a little more in the said time frame of 365 days. I've also accepted the fact that goal setting did not work for me,fml. It's quite tough to accept that crushed feelings after you have a plan, trying to work towards it and it exploded. Later, I found out that it has something to do with my horoscope. Thus, le me is learning to accept it.

Learn, a little more.

The more places I go, the more people I meet, the more things I get in touch to in the previous year made me felt so little. There are so much things I do not know, and that I should not shut myself up. Last November, I took up a HR role in a SME and went with an open mind. Looking forward this year, I hope I would be exposed to more things, like more skills and knowledge based items. Keeping my fingers crossed too for trips that I have in mind and experiences that I have never thought of!

Care, a little more.

I think it is about time to contribute back to the society. I am so busy that I often missed out people who has been trying to meet me up. I was so exhausted JUST by catching up with gatherings that I also missed some. See you all soon!!! I was so into making money I barely spent time with my close ones physically and communicate with them via the whatever ways. Thus, moving forward, I would like to spend time with them, a little more. :) I would also like to try to contribute to some charities or organizations for young children. Teach them music or something.

Open up, a little more.

How well do you know me?
And how well do I know myself?

As I try my best to clear off my mental clutter, I want to give myself a chance to know myself better.
Especially this transition period between school and getting back to the workforce. I am generally a happier person now, and really working hard for my mental health. I think that is my main focus to build on for the year. To make it happen, I want to set aside some time to do soul-searching and explore myself. Hopefully, a better me by the end of the year.

Believe, a little more.

Very blessed to meet Dean again on roomiesCD launch and other session we had as he shared with me the Law of Attraction. I felt that it was extremely helpful for me and it reduced my mental distress that I was going through at that point of time. I remember my homework was to "Believe in Love", which I would want to work on it too. It's tough la, really, when you are in pieces already and people still step on the broken pieces to make it into smaller pieces wtf.

Anyway, I will love myself first and always love the people who loves me. I will also believe in the things I can do, to do better and the ones I can't, that I can.

So I would love, a little more.

I can't believe I actually wrote such positive words.
Well, just a little more.

Follow the flow, a little more.

I met this fortune teller uncle in the middle of the 2015 who told me to stop thinking. Stop thinking about anything and just follow the flow like a piece of driftwood. Someone's gonna realise the beauty of the driftwood and appreciate it. It was also him that allowed me to realise a very severe condition- my thoughts conducts my body's behavior. It might not sound as bad as it seems but it WAS.

No matter how healthy I ate, I am always sick.
No matter what I do, I can't sleep.

Now, I know. It was all my unnecessary thoughts and expectations I had that was pulling me down. The moment I lost myself in my own thoughts, my body failed me. I was mentally ill, therefore it resulted in my bad health ( food poisoning, insomnia and etc) My doctor also asked me to stop thinking so much la wtf. A little achievement unlocked was that I'm no relying on medication to sleep well!

Being part of the process,I had to learn how to make mistakes and accepting the mistake. It was one of the greatest challenges of last year but I think it was one of the best keynotes that I made myself went through. Pure mental torture for the Virgo but I'm glad that I had support. <3 Still learning to accept thou!

Go have fun, a little more.

Aiya, for this... If time permits la.
Recently I was exposed to sports (Wtf right I know) and gotten my SNSC level one cert!
Looking forward to go kayaking again, I actually quite miss the sport.
I kinda wanna be out under the sun more often, and have a much more active lifestyle.
That's something for me to note.
And generally have more fun la, THERE'S SO MUCH WE CAN DO! HAHA #crazycells

Grow, a little more.

Not sideways. But emotionally, physically strong and mentally too!
I want to be more independent, more thoughtful and a little bit more talented.
I've also been training and teaching young children and teenagers but at the same time they are also teaching me things that I do not know. Being part of their life, influencing and growing with them has been a joy. Perhaps a stronger personality?

Level up, a little more.

Sometimes I felt that my life is all about collecting certificates..
There's never ending tests, assignments and examinations.
Hoping to be a licensed driver soon and pass my damn Grade 6 Electone exams.
Also aiming to learn Thai and Japanese and be a certified diver!

Not forgetting, my bachelor's degree and financial stability.

That's quite a lot of things to work on and I should stop.
While I float around in my ocean, I really hope I can make improvements to my life little steps at a time.

May we all be better.

Loves,
A.

16 things that I've realised by 22

So it has been a couple of weeks since I legally turned 22. ( I told people I was 22 so much that I thought I was turning 23 on Sept 15 FML) Anyway I wanted to just pen down some things that I've learnt for the past ten years cause it has been revolutionary. K Kidding, not so serious. But many things did change/happen drastically for the past ten years and I thought it would be nice that I note it down for memories sake. Maybe ten years later I could write about it too, and maybe another ten year series. This post is gonna be so real and personal and wordy, just FYI.

Look, ten years ago, I was 12, over independent little bitch taking PSLE (around the time la). Reflecting through the teenagers years and now, I realised many things...

#1 : I have been blogging for almost ten years.

HAHAHAH I started in Secondary one, for some school project and kept a personal blog that ii typee lyke tis, Aboutt maiix daily life 4 quite some tiime. wtf. I started a new blog (THIS) two years ago, to start a new journey because of manyyyyyy things. Blogging is one of the things that I'm glad I did, and continue doing. I made so many friends through the cyber space and had so much of my memories that I could kept going back to. <3 Like many others, I also did level up my blogging fun, eg making use of the hype and getting perks. It was all good, and views were a big deal to me. Not anymore now, which brings me to the next point.

#2 : Attention is not LOVE.

I admit I WAS an attention whore. I enjoyed/liked/yearned to be the limelight and get all the attention, cause that's the way I thought I was loved. It took me a couple of years to realise that I traded off many things for that short attention I gotten. In return, I lost people's respect, my love and cheapen myself. I'm not sure to say if I regretted it, but if I could turn back time, I probably would do things differently. I would have stopped the public attention to be someone else's everything.

#3 : Letting things go.

"Forget the past, and move forward", it's something that I always have in mind and I know it was right for me to do. Letting things go takes time, and it is easier said that done. After leaving secondary school and moving on to the next phrase was to me the toughest to me. There were so many things that happened in the first six month of my poly life, I found myself trapped in a hell hole and my whole world collapsed. I was not able to make the right decisions for myself and I was helpless. It is painful and really not easy to let go. I would NEVER want to go through that painful three years again. Nonetheless, it was when I met my BFF,Adeline, so I guessed she made things up la. Support from my secondary school friends like Jocelyn (&classmates), and ST made me felt a lot better but occasionally I still live in my past. But I'm still trying, to let go of all those things.

#4 : Livin' in the past.

I would like to think that it was because I didn't had a closure for many things that happened in that horrible three years in NYP. I was so unhappy I had so many "if only,". Only to recently, I felt that like I really need to stop living in the past and be so unhappy about it. At 22, I want to wake up from that bubble.

#5 : It doesn't matter.

Growing up taught me to understand that there are many things that just doesn't matter anymore. Don't have to be so fussy about things and make people's life easier. Can't believe I used to be that spoilt brat.

#6 : Quality not quantity.

Here I'm talking about friends. One can has a million friends and none is good. I'm glad I had a couple quality friends that shows support, love, and different ways of care and concern. And that is enough.Thank you all for being there for me, I can't be any grateful. You know who you are!

#7 : Friendship is not measured by time.

It doesn't matter how long you know that person, or how much time that person spends with you. It's about how supportive one can be, at least to me. The people that matters most to be comes in at different phrases of my life,

#8 : Talk topics are more real now.

From conversations like how that girl next door is such a bitch to useless comments on BGR and my blabbering, I've mastered the skill of having a conversation with anyone about anything under the sun. Talk to me, about anything. *flickhair*

#9 : Ageing is real.

Sigh.

#10 : Being a girl is tough.

Real tough. I hate to accept the fact that I had to deal with the menstrual cycle and having it ruin my life.

#11 : Making your time work for you

At 20, I finished my diploma and joined a MNC as a non-executive staff. I left a year later to pursue my bachelor which I've yet to complete at this point of time. Through the transition period, I had learnt to make my time work for me by maximising my earnings. I realised that I was no longer working at sorta like an fixed hour based pay but stretching my payout to be so much more worth it with lesser working hours.I wished I knew how to it earlier. And no, it is not MLM :)

#12 : Just step out of your comfort zone.

Take baby steps, but be uncomfortable. That's how you learn the most.
No one likes to be uncomfortable you just have to get used to it.

#13 : Travel

Travelling has a different meaning to me now. Ten years ago, I just want to get out of the country to enjoy myself , to explore. Now, each trip is a learning journey. Each trip has its own lessons and values that I can look back.

#14 : Stretch that dollar

Make your dollar work harder for you, purchase more with that same dollar, make the most out of that dollar.

#15 : Silence is golden

#16 : Think further.

Some of my friends would disagree on this point , cause all they want me to do is to stop thinking of things. Think forward, think of what leads to the future. Shape it.

Everything happens for a reason, and probably these are the things I would look back and tell the 16 year old me; the one that's just fresh off from secondary school; doing her first job, getting her first pay. Life's a journey, isn't it ?

Loves,
A.

What is 2013 to me.

Okay la I know like it's already the what? End of 2014 Week 2 buttttt it's never too late to do a flashback for the 2013.

Nothing much, just some key events that happened in my life.

Graduated, got my Diploma .

To be honest, it is really distracting to hear people doubting my education level and also those who think I cannot-make-it and studied in private schools. My face look so dumb ass meh? #irritatingpeopleiseeeveryday

Nonetheless, I'm glad I'm off from the nightmare from school. Of course from time to time, I miss my year 3 classmates but I'm glad we still make the effort to meet up. Thank you for making me feel that I'm worth your time. Always grateful for the help they rendered to me. :']

Got a nail sponsor.

Well, you see. I am a vivid nail art person. My nails are the only thing on me that I felt looks pretty. I have pretty long nails too. & Pretty nails make me confident. Getting sponsored by Mynte Fingers is one of the best things that happened in 2013, this means I get to throw a design to my manicurist, sit back & walk out with pretty nails. I do not have to do it myself anymoreeeeeeeeeeeee. I still owe her blogposts, I hope she don't remember.

Back to Malaysia.

No la, I am a true blue Singaporean but my maternal family are all in Malaysia. I took the opportunity to go back to granny's place with my mum and girlfriends for a short trip before I start to job hunt. I miss those days before I started working like a dog.

Being part of #CNOS2.

Don won on my behalf. I honestly thought I was quite good in the first round but I ended up being the second last. So hais. Nonetheless, I met new blogger friends during the journey and I appreciate that we had a friendly competition. I must say we had great sportsmanship.

Brought Don to Genting.

Thank you RWG for having us! I love the chilly weather of Genting.
I had to miss several trips throughout the year due to work commitments.
Hopefully more collaboration trips in the future again.

A member of Pika Pika Meido Cafe.

I'm starting to feel like an old maid. I've been in the SG Meido Cafe scene since I'm sixteen (?) Nonetheless, I'm thankful for the job opportunities by producers, partners and everyone who support. (no matter as an individual or as a group) Thank you.

Got a Full-time job.

& So I got a full time job because I cannot afford to get a degree and at the same time make me realise how useless am I. Thank you reality. Still, I'm grateful that I am employed. Also the reason why I'm so inactive at blogging now.

Went to Japan

Best birthday gift ever. A pair of return tickets to Japan. Thank you Scoot, & thank you bestf.
I know right I have not finish the travelogue but I promise, soon.
Covered 3 cities in a week, I must say the people I went with are amazing.
They took good care of me.
I miss Japan & I promise to be back soon.

& Hong Kong in the same month.

It was planned before the Japan trip. Experienced the first typhoon in my life during the trip, saw wild dolphins, met a friend that I've missed and shopping was great. #buyallthemmj

Stepped into Clubmed Bintan.

A beach getaway special from the day job. Thank you bosses.

Last but not least, got closer with the *cousins.

It's already the second year with them, but I barely knew most of them. Decided to borrow some courage to join them for some of the gatherings and know them better. Hopefully I'm less awkward with them now. Anyway I also signed up a vacation with them too. #13paxbkktrip.

Ermmm. I think that's all from me.

Loves,
A.

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