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Sunday, January 20, 2019

Farewell, 2018


Happy 2019 !
While 2018 was filled with nasty lessons one after another, it is time to review the chapter and move on for the next. A few days ago, I sat down with my BFF, Adel, to do a quick recap for 2018 and vision-planning for 2019.  Each year both of us will take a day to talk about the previous year and visualise what we intend to do for the new year and we have been doing this activity for a couple of years now. Because both of us are trained to facilitate conversations, we were able to conduct it to push for better and clearer insights, and set it on an action plan. We then complete it with a vision board, where I did mine using Pinterest.com. 

Here’s the questions we asked ourselves this year. 

What did I learnt In 2018 ?

2018 has been a difficult year for everyone, I’m no exception. I had almost half the year of downtime as I tried out new business ideas as I expand and shifted my role as an agent. And I was broke AF oh gosh. Took more exams to up my game in the finance industry and saw/hear negative things of me from people I looked up to.

In 2018, I learned that it is okay to put yourself and your interests first, walk out from toxic environments and that only you will love yourself the most. I started to spend more time with myself and catching and watching the balance of my mental and physical health. I no longer is in guilt for what I do, neither do I owe anyone a living.

In 2018, like I said earlier, I made use of the downtime from my transition by taking up courses, read more and gain more. When this is published, I should have gotten my certificate for being a Certified Facilitator for The Leadership Challenge. ( Been procrastinating on the assignment! Argh ) Also, I cleared all my General Insurance papers which I’ve always wanted to do since I joined the industry.  Not just that, I up-ed my game in numberology. (Wakao it is so difficult la) 

p/s : Typing this made me so happy already. 

 I gained to know more about myself, my struggles and ways to make myself better. I’m so thankful. :) 

What is difficult to do in the start of 2018, but is manageable now .

  • Getting off work to self- love
THIS is the toughest of in the list. I was pretty much always living in the shadow of someone else’s ( eg my boss my friends etc ) and constantly felt guilty when I take time off to do things I want to. Often, I get negative comments and they suck. After my career shift in the middle of the year, I decided to just f*ck it. I need to stop living for others and my past.

  • Attracting financial abundance
An extension from the previous point, I was also constantly feeling that if I don’t work, I would be poor and then no time/ resources to take care of the rest. I was having hard time with my finances especially when you have about half an year of having barely no income/ surviving on very little money. It created a lot of anxiety problems for me. Thankfully, I’ve shifted my mindset. It is okay to get off work/ earn less  to do things that can make me happier and when I am happier, the rest of the things would flow. Money will also come naturally. 

  • Change for being more present.
I came to a point in my life that I realised that I was either living in my past or I was in my future. I was a dreamer. Probably the reason why I couldn’t link my thoughts and actions together to turn it into the reality. I wasn't really paying attention to people in my life cause I was not present at all. I'm still learning so give me some time. For now, I take baby steps to access my present situations and think through of what are the actual useful steps for me to make.
  • Take care of yourself and the universe will take care of the rest.
Yup. As real as it is.
  • Acknowledging problems, be aware and resolve it.
Being part of positive living is to acknowledge the existence of problems, feelings & emotions and circumstances. It is only when we acknowledge them, we can let go and move on. That would also help to gain more awareness, and resolve issues easier. Thus, improving in our problem solving skills and adaptability.

What do you want to achieve in 2019 ?
  1. Be more present and be grounded
  2. Feel the fear and do it anyway.
  3. Better discipline
  4. Spend time and attention wisely
  5. Plan for my retirement.
  6. Travel more; see more; experience more;
  7. Converting my business ideas into reality
  8. Read more
  9. Sponsor a child.


Can't wait to experience what 2019 has for me . 
Loves,
A.
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Friday, January 18, 2019

Ten years down.


Ten years, quick and easy - just flies like that.
Thanks to the #10yearchallenge , I thought it would also be nice to pen down my thoughts at this moment while reminiscing what I've been through the past ten years and to see whether I had a drastic change ! :D 

Ten years ago, I did my O'levels and graduated , I had a boyfriend, and I was looking forward to what life had installed for me. Within these ten years, I did my diploma, I fell into depressed mode, broke up with my then boyfriend, I had my down time. It was tough, real tough and I hated those days. Never a day was a looking forward to school, but thankfully I managed to strap it through. I met my BFF in school, and I'm glad we held hands and pull through those dark days and that we are in a much better place now. I spent a lot of time on the internet, there's when I made a lot of friends from the internet got closer with some of them. I remember a period when I was very active in blogging and I had products sent to my house weekly for product reviews!

I was fancy. I liked my nails to be painted all the time. I always try to look my best, quirky, spends a lot of money on clothes and basically things that would make me pretty - it was to boost my self- esteem

Ten years down, I matured, I am no longer in a relationship with someone else but in a better relationship with myself. I now had a Bachelor Degree that I fought for, some skillset up my belt and a future that I'm not quite sure about. These days, I grown to care more for others, and I know, I have so much more to achieve.

I stopped my bi-weekly manicures. These days I would only have my nails painted occasionally over festive seasons. I stopped trying to impress people, I care for my own comfort more. I wear what I like, I make myself like myself more.

We all have come far haven't we ?
Life, what challenges are you going to throw me next ?

Loves, 
A.
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Sunday, September 2, 2018

25 things I've learnt at 25

  1.  Mahjong
    Oh gosh, this has took me long enough. I mean like "I'm Chinese! I should I know this at the back of my mind! "
     I'm still bad at it but hey! at least I've got some basics there.
  2. Be truthful towards your feelings

    I've been drowning myself with positive thoughts, positive vibes all these years while I keep myself out of my shit hole to realise that, hey! that's not how it works. And I realised that that's what people have been doing too.

    "Wrap yourself with positive people, positive vibes, positive every single thing"

    So much positivity that it can do harm than good. I've learnt to address my feelings like a little kid, by asking myself questions on what have I done right to have a great day and vice versa. Of course, on bad days, learning to grill myself with questions like : What's wrong, what caused me to feel in a certain negative way and then resolve it. ( Here you go, a good practice on Design Thinking! ) Basically finding the root of the problem and then a solution to make it better. :)

  3. Categorise your friends -  "Yes" / Sour / The Guide

    The "Yes" friend is anyone's favourite, they agree to everything you say and of course say what you want to hear. Everyone likes things that is pleasant to them.
    The sour friend on the other hand is someone who have gotten something nasty to comment about ANYTHING. A bad listener and a worst one to heed advise from.
    The guide is one like a life coach ; that friend that makes sure you are on track and make sure you are set for your goals.

    None of them are bad friends, they are good in their own way but knowing which category they belong to had made me a better person/friend/team player. It helped me respond better in situations and know who to look for when I need affirmation (to the YES friend!). Sour friends are good for gossips plus they are great people who have tons of great deals. It also makes ME reflect on what kind of friend am I too as well as to who I should hang out with .

  4. Create more than you consume

    I had to credit it to the original writer though I can't remember who. The thing is this, I've been "consuming" lot of content online, by consuming I meant reading articles, watching videos etc. I have been doing so much of that, I forgot to "return" the favour by contributing to the community with the knowledge I have! That's bad, and so I decided to share as much as I can, maximise my creativity and inspirations for and with the common good. Busy is just an excuse.

  5. Skincare first, Make-up second
    Aging is real, that's what I always say and that's freaking truth. With that, it means that I age and I have to spend more money on getting my skin right. Also, learning to be comfortable with my own skin. Uncomfortable, painful and disgusting process I'm putting myself through.

    I try to not wear any make up as long as I'm not meeting important clients, or events to attend while taking pictures without makeup is still a huge NO. I'll learn, I promise.

  6. Do what you need to do.
    If it's right or has to be done, do it, somehow.
  7. Change 
    Change is this scary shit friend that freaks us all out. But the only constant is, CHANGE.. Whether you change for the best or for the worst. So feel the fear, but do it anyway.

  8. Be adventurous 
    Do things that you have never done before, go places you've thought of before.
  9. Life's not a buffet.
    Can't have too much on your plate, woman. It causes ingestion and there's a drop in food quality. Some days we fall for greed, we just have to remember to climb out from that.
  10. Be Hungry
    Always remember for the days you do not have enough food, to remind yourself to appreciate what you have and be a better self.
  11. Everyone have something to teach you.
    And if you are not open about it, you are losing out.
    My takeaway from this : NEVER JUDGE, Be kind, put on a smile and strike a conversation. You'll never know the impact that person can bring to you.
  12. Fix things, mend things and not discard them
    Be it an item, or a relationship - learn from the problem first.

  13. Be curious
    Have an open mind,always
  14. Never Mind
    But never mind. Never mind about what people say and their opinions, never mind about mistakes.
    Never mind about the judgement.
  15. Keep learning. 
    Learn from everything that comes your way - Feelings, mistakes, any life lessons
  16. Numerology
    I guess the most interesting subject that I've got in touch would be to learn about numerology. Yup, upgrading my witchcraft one step at a time.
  17. Do the right thing
    The world is small, the world is connected.
    Don't do shit cause people will find out.
  18. It's ok to be alone
    I am totally fine with being alone, and people needs to know that.
    People needs to know that we don't need other human to be with us to survive. We came to the world alone and we will leave alone too.
  19. Love yourself first
    <3
  20. Fundamentals of The Leadership Challenge
    and putting the five practices into daily use. It is not something new in my life, but knowing it in-depth and finally practicing it daily is. There are still so much to become a better leader to my peers and especially towards myself.
  21. The Science of Meditating
    At 25, I finally took the time off for meditation and it was one of the best decision made. It decluttered my mind, helped me be more mindful and showed more gratitude to the earth and universe.
  22. Be Sincere
    Always. Be. Nice. Sincerity will lead you to great things.
  23. Kindness always triumphs 
    Be Kind, even if the world fails you.
  24. Take Care of yourself.
    And the universe will take care of the rest. It is only when we take care of ourselves, respect our body, communicates with our minds, the best will find its way to us.
  25. You make your own happiness.
    You are the one that would put a smile on your face and you are in full control of that, and your life. 
Happy Birthday, me. 

With a lot of love, 
A.
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Thursday, May 24, 2018

10 things I did to save more money

I mean like it's quite obvious that this is semi occupation hazard but also good practices that I would always keep in mind.


  1. Save at least 30-50% of your income automatically. 
    One practice that most of us don't practice and I'm kinda guilty for that as well. I used to diligently do that when I was holding an office job and things got off when I went back to school and doing freelancing work. It's a phrase and I feel that it does get harder as we grow older, but I'm striving to get this good habit back on track after my transition period as well.
  2. Have two jobs, save 100% of one salary
    Because I no longer have a fixed pay, every month I had variable amounts and they comes in at different days of the month. It makes savings much tougher and cash flow harder to keep track. What I did was to keep one incoming salary to a separate bank so it naturally become part of my savings :)
  3. Let your savings work harder.
    The simplest way is to do some "homework" and park your money in a bank that gives the best interest rate. An even better way is to set aside a portion of the savings and sign up for an endowment plan, I suggest a shorter term eg 5 years, and then review every five years, just in case of a disruption. A shorter term endowment plan works well for freelancers like myself since we do not contribute to CPF and we "lose out" from the employer CPF contribution portion too. The 5-year endowment plan serve as a "CPF contribution" with less flexibility compared to the bank but you know you can get it out in an agreed date (policy maturity date).
  4.  Buy things during sales.
    One of my shopaholic practices is that I would barely buy anything full retail price. While I am really very grateful that I have amazing family and friends around that are able to give me amazing discounts and deals, I am seldom tempted by impulse purchase which brings me to the next point.
  5. Only buy things you need 
    I'm a girl and I like pretty, fine things. I love my Louis Vuitton and Chanel bags and I cannot lie! People often buy things to impress and we don't think through when we are at the moment. If you really have to, do a price comparison first.

    p/s : Here we are talking about big ticket items.

    Some questions I usually ask myself before I buy :
    Q : Would I be able to use this item everyday ?
    Q : If not, will I see myself using it 5-10 years later ?
    Q : Is the price worth its quality ?
    Q : Do I really need it ?
  6. Do a price comparison - Taobao might not always be the cheapest!Don't get me wrong. I love Taobao and I've been getting my stuff from Taobao since my secondary school days. Back in those days we use agent to daigou for us and we have to send in our orders in excel format, for real. What I realise these days is that we have so many other e-commerce sites that makes taobao not the cheapest option anymore.
    For example , this LED lit mirror / lamp
    It was the same price on taobao and hipvan after the chinese dollar conversion, but! it was overall cheaper when I use Hipvan because there's free shipping/delivery plus there was a discount code on it. If I were to make the purchase through taobao, I would have to worry about the shipping fee and any complications (every electronic thing has this), the electric plug etc.

    Same situation for my purchase on my Xiaomi Air Purifier from Lazada too.

  7. Less is more. 
    Sell away things that duplicates or no longer in use. 
    Rarely use ? = sell.
    I could totally give it away or get some cash back for whatever item it can. The choice is up to individual, while I feel that it does make a person feel much better when you paid for a purchase and you get back cash for it.
  8. Learn to share
    Sharing is caring, indeed! One simple yet good example was carpooling, ride hitching and sharing accounts - opt in to share a Netflix Account or friends to come together for a Spotify Family account.
    Talking about gadgets, currently I had sold my cameras and is only solely using my mobile while occasionally borrowing Yongwei's #jennythedrone for travel or commissioned work. It IS an expensive toy but I think it is not whether you can afford one or not but more like the the chances of me utilizing.
    My friends and I sometimes share our wardrobe too (mostly my friends coming to borrow my clothes). There are days we need to attend one formal event once in maybe three blue moon so there's absolutely pointless to make a purchase for that occasion, so you borrow.
  9. Invest in quality productsI spend alot of money in quality items.
    Quality over Quantity anytime.
    I believe in the value of how it is made, the practicality of the material used and design behind it.That being said would need a lot of research to be done, on its brand, quality reviews etc.

    With the right brand, it is definitely worth the penny over the long run.
  10. Make more money to buy what you want.
    An extra side job, a small online business or investments instruments. No one relies on one income to make money - it is not possible. The toughest yet best way to gain more savings would be to make more money through investments or starting having a side income. 

"Savings & investment are all you're left with after a career. Education, certificates, experiences eventually become useless"  

I hope it's useful! Good luck!

Loves, 
A.



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Tuesday, April 3, 2018

The relation between boys and mushrooms

It all started out as a joke.

One day, my friends and I were at a siamdiu where we had drinks and were *ahem* looking at boys.
The conversation started something like that  :

Friend ,"that boy quite cute ah, wanna try not" 
Me, " Cannot la, look at him, he's an enoki mushroom!" 


So presenting to you...

The 10 types of boys in termsof edible mushrooms.

1. Enoki mushrooms


Yes it is a hot favourite on the steamboat menu, and you know.
They ARE delicious, but sorry, cannot digest.
好看好吃不好消化。 - He's good-looking, hot but nah, not boyfriend material.
Usually Asians, and may or may not have interest in girls. :')
They are the ones that girls are go crazy after or eye-candy, but you know - really cannot bring home one la.


2. Shiitake Mushrooms.


aka the one inside your ba chor mee. 
They are savoury and meaty, usually more popular after they are dried.
Just like the bachelors in their late 30s. Crisis.
They are alright boys, average to the max , super nice friends to be with but never to be seen with a girl.
Somebody save them thanks.


3. Button Mushrooms.


Cute young things, usually 18-25 year old.
Have not seen the world and not so sure how to treat their girlfriends right.
Always in a dilemma between their bros and their girlfriends (who are always following the trends and expecting stuff from their button mushrooms so that they can flaunt on instagram)
Young, wild and freeeeee


4. Portobella 


The one that thinks that they are of a higher class.
The portobella, has a meatier texture but lesser in taste, usually sauteed.
Boys who pick their girls to talk to, ARGH.

5. Oyster Mushrooms. 


Considered expensive to average families and fragile.
Nothing worth mentioning about the taste.
The boys that comes from the quite well to do families, horribly pampered by their parents and basically have no skill sets but to party all day er day.
They don't deserve to have a girlfriend, they just need their mummies.

6. Honey Mushrooms 


Honey mushrooms have a chewy texture with a slightly sweet taste.
They are usually boys in between late twenties early thirties, knows how to please their girlfriends very well. They are also the ones that have plans to settle down for a family, usually boring towards the girlfriend but have a lot of fun with their friends. They have stable income (a 9-5 job) with or without career prospects and pretty tired about this "when are you going to get married" thing.

7. Truffle Mushrooms


Expensive stuff. They are like the 土豪s - ugly, fat but rich.
Girls are only going after truffle oil, oops I mean money.
Usually spotted with or on pictures with sginstababe girls /super materialistic girls.
Because those are the only people that will entertain them.

8. Chanterelles 


Yellowish in color and offers a light floral note.
Most gentle than you, more vain than you.
Best sisters to befriend more.
They also have more boyfriends in their list than you.

9. Morels. 


May not have the best  of looks, but in terms of taste, they are delicious and savoury.
They are like the 李大仁, the one that have below average looks/qualities, zero fashion sense, definitely not someone you will notice first but, best boyfriend ever.
If they are lucky, they usually have a very pretty and kind wife. :)
They are the ones that we question, "Why his face like that can have supermodel girlfriend????" 

10. "Hens of the woods" 


Often known as "maitake" or the "dancing mushrooms"
They are packed with rich, earthy flavours.
As you would tell, they are good with keeping their girlfriends assured with their "future".
Their girls would also stupidly believe them with his looks and quality of words used.
Lifestyle wise, everything also game first, brothers first and their ridiculous dreams. #Helpla.
Always hanging out with their bros while their girlfriends just sit beside them.
Future/ Career - unclear.


Pardon me, I love mushrooms okay. They are roots vegetables and they are healthy, they have many health benefits but I can't help to think that boys have the same properties too. hahahaha.

Disclaimer : Every mushroom boys are good and bad in their own way okay.
Don't throw rotten mushrooms when you see me on the street thanks.

I hope you enjoyed this article and quick question, what kind of mushroom are you/ you dating!

Loves,
A.

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Whirlwind

It's crazy, before I could update on the space about the start of my 2016, 2017 has ended and so is the first quarter of 2018. Here's a summary.

In 2016, I completed my unfinished business (overdue modules from school). Phew, no more crying and reading and studying at the same time. And also completed 4 basic sets of exams from SCI (Singapore College of Insurance). Became a financial services consultant at the end of that year, while I enjoyed the job scope as much as I did, I was still doing what I love - teaching and training.

I hope that answers everyone who's asking me about what do I really do. I train/coach, I give tuition (still, to my existing students) and I also I advise on financial planning.

And I still do, I have a clear vision for what I envision. The difference now? I left the company that I joined in Nov 2016.

There's so many things to say; it was not a decision I made over a fortnight, not influenced by any and most importantly - it came from the heart. While part of me still have mixed feelings for the change, I'm grateful and I'm excited for better things to come.


Loves,
A.
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